It's Time

Very early tomorrow morning, I will bring David to Shriner's Hospital in Chicago for his cleft lip repair surgery.

It's time.

I've tried to explain what will be happening in the best way I think he'll understand. What he has taken away from our discussions is that his lip will look like everyone else's in the family instead of going up in the middle. And that he'll be able to learn to whistle.

Al and I have noticed fairly recently that the stares he has been getting in public are much more frequent. I think it has to do with the fact that as he gets older and bigger, his personality is getting "bigger", too, and he's just noisier, more exhuberant, and draws more attention to himself in general.

Children will often come up to us and ask, "How did he hurt his mouth?" or "What happened to his lip?" I carefully explain what a cleft lip is, that he was born with it, that he can eat and talk just like anyone, and most importantly, that it does not hurt. Lately, he is more aware that these questions are being asked, and sometimes participates a little in the answers.

It's time.

A few weeks ago, Shi Shi and I visited a lovely preschool where he will attend two mornings a week this summer. While we visited, he got to participate in their Circle Time, and then did a little painting of the sun with the children. I stood to the side and watched, lump in my throat, as two little boys backed away from him and would not sit in the empty seat next to him (fortunately, David was oblivious).

It's time.

I hate, hate, hate surgery. I've only had a few procedures done, mostly outpatient, one with a two-day stay. But I hate the feeling of anesthesia, the drugs, the IVs, the discomfort, the trying not to stretch sutures, the sterility of the hospital, the simply not being home when you most want to be. And I hate, hate, hate having to put my little guy through that, too. I know the doctors, nurses and other staff at Shriner's are top-notch and will do the very best for him, keeping him comfortable and entertained in addition to providing him with the very best medical treatment. But I sure wish he didn't have to experience any of it. David can eat neatly, drink from any straw or open cup, and his speech has made remarkable progress in just the last couple of months. Function-wise, he's doing just fine. But those stares, those comments, those questions from others...

It's time.

Sometimes, as I tell friends that he's functioning just fine, that his cleft does not affect his everyday life, that I wish I didn't have to put him through surgery, they respond, "But of course you have to! You have to do this for him!" Yes, of course we do. We understand that life isn't just about functioning. That it is human nature to treat those who are different, well, differently. But I can still wish he didn't have to go through surgery. That he could simply be appreciated for the essence of who he is (smart, funny, silly, energetic, strong, stubborn, loving, tender, active), not what he looks like. But my emotional ambivalence aside...

It's time.

Happy One-Year Gotcha Day, David!

What a difference a year can make!

Family "portrait", one year ago in Taiyuan, Shanxi Civil Affairs office.

We three now.

David, his first evening with us.

Our boy now.

We Are Family!

There have been a lot of germs floating around our house these days, so not much time for introspective blogging. But I can't let today pass without celebrating our wonderful boy! We thank God for his presence in our family every day!

One Year Ago - March 7

We woke up bright and early the morning of March 7th and headed for the Beijing airport. Our destination: Taiyuan, Shanxi and our little Shi Shi!

Our facilitator, Bill, was happy to take photos for us!

Our first aerial view of Taiyuan...

The room in the Continental Hotel that would be "home" for the next week...

The view of Taiyuan from our hotel room window. Smoggy.

The hotel entrance. Note: it was VERY cold!

We walked to a nearby WalMart to buy children's clothes as a gift to the welfare institute. WalMart was quite an experience!

Two Sick Kids

David is recovering from bronchitis and an ear infection, and Abbie is down with a virus that includes high fevers. This afternoon, I found them on the living room couch napping in this position. I had to snap a picture of them - it was so sweet and peaceful.

Until Abbie threw up all over the couch.

Bleah.

One Year Ago - March 5 and 6

We pretty much lost the better part of March 5th in the air, but were able to enjoy a wonderful dinner of Peking duck and a special show. This actor's mask changed before our eyes with some sort of mechanism.
Mmmmmm... :)

After dinner, we were able to Skype the girls!

This was the view of Beijing from our hotel window the next morning.

We squeezed a lot into our only full day in Beijing. First, the jade factory...

Next, my favorite stop, the Great Wall.

Then on to the cloisonne factory.

And finally a stop for lunch with our group!

Then a quick trip to see Tiananmen Square.

I can't for the life of me remember what we did for dinner that evening. But I do remember being filled with excitement as we prepared to leave for Taiyuan the next morning!

One Year Ago - Day 1

Mommy Time

A big concern of parents of several children is how to give them each the individual time and attention they need. Last night, Hannah was in need of some "Mommy Time" and requested a special time with me. This is a little tradition that has evolved over the last couple of years and really works well for us, especially as the kids get older and life gets busier.

Mommy Time used to be a date night, with dinner and maybe a little shopping. But as our schedules got busier and finances got tighter, it was more and more difficult to work these evenings into our hectic weeks. Now, when someone needs Mommy Time, it happens right at home. The special girl gets ready for bed, but gets in Mom and Dad's bed, and usually reads while waiting for me to put David to bed. Then I get in my jammies too, and get in bed with my special girl. We might talk, or read, or watch part of a movie. Sometimes I knit. Last night, Hannah requested that we watch an American Experience US History DVD. There is always great snuggling involved! Once in a while, we end up having a really good talk about something. But more often than not, we just have quiet together time without interruption. I try to make these nights on a non-school night, so we can stay up a bit later, but sometimes we've just needed to do it on a school night, and that's OK. When Al comes up to bed, the special girl is usually asleep, and he scoops her up and carries her to her bed.

The added bonus is that it gets me to bed pretty early, too!

Our Abbie is 7!!!

Happy, happy 7th birthday to our sweet, sassy, spunky Abbie! What a loving, compassionate, happy little girl you are! You fill our lives with joy, sunshine and love! And wonderful snuggles!

Happy Gotcha Day, Rachel!

Eight years with this sweet girl! Happy, energetic, funny, smart, sensitive, caring, hard-working, snuggly, great swimmer, super speller, talented artist, lover of elephants, bouncy, tender, wonderful blessing!

Simple Woman's Daybook - February 14th

Outside my window... chilly, grey, damp - again! At least the temps are in the upper 30s.

I am thinking... of how God has blessed me with so many people to love on this Valentine's Day!

I am thankful for... the call we got this morning from Shriner's, giving us David's surgery date.

I am wearing... a red turtleneck, grey V-neck cable sweater, jeans, red and grey wool socks, my LL Bean Wicked Good slippers.

I am going... out to lunch this afternoon with my two favorite guys for Valentine's Day.

I am creating... a whole lot of WIPs (Works In Progress) or UFOs (Un-Finished Objects) scattered around the house. Not much creating time these days.

I am currently reading... Nikon D40 for Dummies.

I am hoping... that all my children stay healthy now!

I am hearing... Christopher Parkening's "Simple Gifts" CD.

In the kitchen... spaghetti casserole defrosting on the counter (I love when I get an extra batch of something into the freezer), ingredients for cupcakes for Valentine's Day.

Around the house... preparations for Abbie's horse-themed birthday party this Saturday.

One of my favorite things... a little quiet time at home in the morning while the kids are all at school.

A few plans for the rest of the week... one-year post placement visit with our social worker tomorrow afternoon, Jim Gill family concert at school tomorrow night, Rachel's Gotcha Day on Wednesday, Nana flies in from RI on Friday, Abbie's party on Saturday.

Here is a picture I'd like to share with you...

(The picture of the three of us that we will send to the folks in China as part of our one-year update.)