Wednesday, December 02, 2009

A New, Um, Preoccupation

OK, so the other evening, this Houseful of Girls was discussing the arrival of the new Little Brother. I mentioned that since David was not yet potty trained, they would be blessed with the supreme privilege of helping me with diaper changes. The question was asked, since he's a boy, would putting a diaper on him be any different than on a girl. You know, because boys have "peanuts". I said no, diapers were worn the same way by both boys and girls.

So yesterday, Abbie and I were walking through Target, choosing a few small items to put in a care package we'll be sending to David in China. The store wasn't too busy - just a few old ladies and moms with young children.

"MOMMY, OUR BROTHER IS GOING TO HAVE A PE***!"

Did I mention Abbie's voice could slice through steel, especially when she's discussing something she feels is of extreme importance?

"Ummm, yes, honey, he will, because he's a boy."

I quickly looked around. No one too close to pay much attention. Time to redirect.

"Oh, let's go down this aisle. I need contact solution."

"Y'KNOW, MOMMY, I USED TO THINK IT WAS CALLED A 'PEANUT', BUT THEN HANNAH TOLD ME IT WAS CALLED A 'PE***'!

Yes, honey, I'm sure she set you straight. "Mmm-hmm... Hey, what do you think you'd like to have for lunch today?"

"Can I have some of the chicken noodle casserole from last night?"

"Sure, we have plenty left over!" Huge sigh of relief from me...

"MOMMY, HOW BIG IS DAVID'S PE*** GOING TO BE? WILL IT BE THIS BIG (holding thumb and finger about two inches apart)?"

"Honey, he's a toddler. We'll see when we get him home and change his diapers... Oh, look, I need a new tablecloth..."

"Hey, Mommy, you know how Daddy travels a lot for work?"

Whew - definitely a new topic. "Yes..."

"WELL HOW IS HE GOING TO TEACH DAVID ABOUT HOW TO USE HIS PE*** IF HE'S NOT HOME?"

It's not easy getting out of Target without making eye contact with a single person, but I tried. Where does she come up with this stuff???

12 comments:

Lisa said...

Thank you so much Miss Abbie for making me laugh! Too cute!!

Allison said...

Ha! Man, reading your blog just now was more effective than a big cup of coffee...I'm ready for my day, with a big smile and a giggle in my voice now!
I'm enjoying every minute of this journey with you!
Can I use more exclamation points?!?
:)

Kathleen said...

I am laughing and crying...I love how these moments seem to always happen in stores or at church:)

Stacy said...

You make me laugh!!! I needed that!!

Karin Katherine said...

OH MY WORD....I cannot stop laughing. My boys used to call it peanuts too...I cannot wait to tell them that when they are macho stud teenagers! LOL

Bobbi said...

I am crying I am laughing so hard!!! How funny!!! Reese calls his a peanut too!!! Krista thinks that is soooooooo funny!!

Jill said...

LMAO! I lOVE it! That is hysterical! And I thought my Lucy was loud!

GGHadden said...

Oh thank you for that morning laugh :) I can only imagine your face.

Lisa said...

That is too funny!!! Anna use to have debates with my mom. My mom would call the privates, "birdy" (don't ask, I don't know why). Anna was sure to set her straight because she had a 'virgina', not a 'birdy'. My mom got so tired of hearing vir____. That she had to tell me to have a talk with Anna. I of course did not put a stop to that!!

Sara said...

Experiences like this are the number one reason for the existence of blogs! Thank you for sharing this very Abbie conversation.

Kristi said...

Just stopping by from RQ ~ and laughing with you! Our daughter had some of the same reactions as we waited for our son last year...
Your LOA came a month before ours, I'm hoping you have a quick TA process to pave the way for those of us behind you!

Susan said...

Hilarious story, thanks for sharing.

I used to check in regularly but have fallen behind and so was THRILLED to come here today and find out you're about to adopt a little boy! Congratulations to all of you!

Susan, mama to Rachel Shu-Ting, nearly 4, adopted from Hunan province through Sunny Ridge